Monday
Jun072010

The World Cup..... Phwaaah!

Ok it’s almost World Cup time. I have noticed the increased advertising, cars with stickers and flags, and nightly news reports on Harry Kewells Balls! (Groin)

But to perfectly honest... do we really care?

I mean unless you were brought up with Soccer like my cousin Marc, does anyone in Australia really care that Germany, Italy, France or Brazil will win the world cup again?

Personally I think that Aussies only like the world cup because it gives us an excuse to pretend we are European during the cup and also (& probably more important) the excuse to get pissed at strange times!

Have a think about that one, not many Aussies can remember the score when Australia played Umbukstani in the preliminary preliminary qualifying final, but you can remember when you got off your face on German beer during the world cup final, you can remember when your mate passed out at the 73rd minute, Jacko peed his pants sleeping on the kitchen floor & the dog ate Brads shoe (sounds like a real story huh).

But really very few of us care about the World Cup!

Some of you might have been sucked in & bought the latest Australia football jumper (I don’t think they call them Guernsey in soccer).... how many times will you wear it? twice, maybe three times.... then it will hang in your cupboard until the next clean out & then end up at the charity shop!

And what about the pretenders? The people that at work say “Gee’s we played well last night” after watching the highlights on Sunrise before coming to work! Or “We were robbed!”..... when we actually can put a team together that is capable of winning, then we have the right to be “Robbed”

The great thing about AFL & ARL is that we actually get a break from it, a season goes for between 26 & 30 weeks, but then you get the build up to the new season! Soccer however is played somewhere in the world 12 months a year!.... no break or build up to the next year!.... BORING!

Marc my cousin & Rob from Sydney will probably argue with me.... but boys... Deal with it, Soccer is not a real sport!

I’m the Chairman & this is my Blog!

Monday
May242010

Welcome back Bloggies

Welcome back Bloggies, it has been a couple of weeks since we got home & boy what a couple of weeks!

 But enough about me, it’s time for some bloggin!

 Ok I could get straight into Ruddy & his mate Budgy (Abbot) but a few of you would argue with me. So what I’m going to do tonight is introduce all of you regulars to the rest of the regulars, I mean if we are going to do this Blog thingy, we may as well all know who we all are.

 I am the chairman, and as the chairman I have ultimate power & the final say. Some of you have felt the wrath of the chairman, so don’t cross me! I am also the foreman & organiser around the house. I coordinate work & activities with the rest of the chairman’s family.

 The Chairman’s Wife, some of you know her as Ness, Vanessa, Nessy. Now Ness is really the brains behind us all, we have our ideas & thoughts.... but Ness brings it all together! An awesome cook & responsible for at least 15 of my extra 20 kilo’s! She is chief lunch maker for Dan.... who recently admitted that she makes “Cool” lunches. She even enters Brad’s room!.... I would rather play with nuclear waste naked than go into Brad’s room!

 Brad the boy!.... my oldest son, Brad started shaving at 13, he has a hairier back than his uncle Brad & can grow great Abraham Lincoln sideburns! Recently survived an interlude with a psychotic girlfriend who screwed with his head even more than his little brother does. Brad has the biggest heart of anyone I know and will often put others before himself!.... Ya Big Dummy!!!!!

 Dangaz the legend!.... a 13 year old body with the mind of a 75 year old, he often has the Chairman & his wife in stitches with the way he thinks & acts, totally manipulates his brother & can ride a bike & motorbike like Casey Stoner, Travis Prastrana & Lance Armstrong’s  love child!

 Panda the Wonderdog..... What can I say, the other woman in my life!

 Granny & Bert.... Granny is my mum, Bert is her husband. Granny has 6 kids & the Chairman is the oldest, and as much as we like to think we are in control of our own lives.... Granny still controls us all! & Bert..... We love you mum (it’s a bit weird that I call my mum Granny! But when everyone else does it is a bit hard not to!)

 Sandy & David..... The chairman’s wife’s parents, and her friends. David’s BBQ skills are legendary & Sandy can even make fabric babies! (She is making one for Anika & for Dan!) Try as you like David you will never convert Dan to support Collingwood!

 Now on to the regular Bloggies...... in no particular order!

 Rob in Vietnam..... Now this is a mixed bag! How do I describe an American with Australian citizenship that is working in Vietnam! But a regular on the travel Blog & I expect will be on the new one. An amazing resource for spa & beauty treatments & currently struggling with sizing issues in Asian countries...... I mean small should be small EVERYWHERE hey Rob!

 Meredith in Un Zud.... or NZ for those of you who read Aussie! Again a prolific blog contributor, and an expert on small toilet paper squares (see I don’t forget Meredith!)

 Arama from across the ditch! Another Kiwi inhabitant that looked awesome in her dress at our wedding! Currently struggling with career issues & doing something very well that she really does not want to be doing (well just my interpretation!) keep sending the insights A.

 Heather my sister..... oh what can I say about someone that I fought with so much when younger but love & respect now she has realised that I am and always will be the smarter & more dominant of the siblings..... Love you Heather.

 Brad Atkins.... My brother in law & mate. A constant source of amusement with his terminal case of analism! For Christ sake not only does he file his recipes in alphabetical order but he rates them with a star system!

 Marc Walker.... my cousin & pseudo brother! Mate you are a Wood/Mack through & through! A walking sports encyclopaedia, and a big brother to all the kids. Hard to annoy but with a temper that Barry Hall would be proud of.

 Marg & Norm.... Fellow travellers and soul mates..... may your internet connection be strong in the middle of no where.... at least long enough to read the Chairman’s thoughts & to reply with your adventures!

 Sarah F.... Ness’s long time friend & now mine. Great for an argument or an opinion.... Don’t mess with the Chairman Sare’.... Cries more at happy times than at sad times!.... What the! Still on the hunt for an elusive Polly Waffle.

 Caren & Kampbell...... Hehehe I used this in an old blog and cracked myself up.... so will continue to swap their letters around. Karen always challenges the female way of thinking in me, & Campbell just makes me proud to be a bloke!

 Katrina Gay..... Financial planner extraordinaire! And her dancing daughter Anika..... I was going to mention Matt gay but he won’t read the blog so I won’t bother!

 Bonnie & Egg...... These two don’t say much but I know they read the Blog. And Egg is secretly jealous of our old Land Rover Discovery.

 Naomi & Mark.... another two quiet blog readers, but they send their thoughts via email.... join in the blog guys!

 Dave & Lyndal.... With two daughters under 5 they don’t have a chance to email but we often talk on the phone & share our blog thoughts with them.

 Sandy W..... a Blackfella in a whitefella’s body, a hippy & a greenie all rolled into one!

 Phil C in Sydney..... who should get in the bush more often..... the city will kill you Phil!

 Mel S in Bris Vegas..... who recently returned from Las Vegas. A poker player that is having an intimate relationship with Tom Cruze

 Nikki & Rob.... the Sydney perspective. Just shows that although we are only 900km apart, they do things all wrong up in Sydney.... Rob is passionate about Soccer (World cup soon Rob.... Nikki will be moving out) & Nikki argues with the Chairman about  his opinions on our indigenous brothers & sisters and the illegal entrants to our wonderful land (otherwise known as Abo’s & Boat people!) Bring it on Nikki!

 Angie.... Who’s life just brought ours back to earth every time she blogged us!

 Lesley.... My baby sister who now lives in Qld, again always good for a political argument, but able to pull the cute little sister angle at any time! Her kids & husband are always good for a question or two... keep them coming Creep!

 Georgia.... another sister, but able to bring practicality & sense to my arguments (I remember the comment.... Deodorant $4.95.... cheap Port $3.25..... what do you think they would choose?) cracked me up again!

 Shona (sister) & Sam..... tells it like it is, if you really want to know how you look, feel or are acting..... ask Shona, she will tell you!.... Love your honesty Shonz

 Ilsa B..... Gorgeous & a great catch for any of you guys out there!.... Travels too much & needs to settle down & find a good man!.... (Or boy.... Dan you reading this???? She is only 20 years older than you & she is Hot!!!)

 Mary & Pete..... fellow travellers, 4WD’rs,Restaurant visitors & Backyard lovers!.... is there nothing better than sitting in each others back yards with food & beer?.... oh & the way that Pete just floors Ness every time with his comments..... Priceless!

 Marc & Christopher......  Movie afficianado’s and recently moved North to Sydney. Don’t think that means you escape the Chairman’s attention.... look forward to your comments on the blog & the next lot of visual entertainment.

 Susanne & Tim.... soon to be joined with a new baby. Don’t think that will let you off lightly Susanne.... upset the chairman & I’ll tell you what I really think.

 Lorraine & Michael..... Keep the fart jokes coming L.  Promise I won’t offend animals in the new blog!

 Bec is also having a baby..... maybe I will have to include some bedtime stories in the blog, ones that the new mothers can read to their kids..... Ok lets see... no Abo’s, no boat people, no politics, no dead animals..... oh bugger it! Read your kids your own bedtime stories.

 Jackie in Singapore..... also having a baby..... Maybe it is my blog that is causing all of these pregnancies! Feel free to name your kids after me girls!!!!!

 Anne & Gary, Liz & John..... don’t think you have slipped under the radar either!

 Vanessa M.... read but don’t comment.... maybe I’ll do a whole blog on you & make you deny all my rumours!!!!..... hahahahahahaha..... (evil laugh!!!)

 Box & Lou.... started out strong on the travel blog but faded away towards the end. Can’t keep up with the pace huh????? Maybe the Dubai heat has worn you both down!

 Flick, always a story & alternative view on what we do, love it Flick.....

 And to the rest of you fence sitters, join in & get to know the rest of us.

 Lets get this thing going!

 Respectfully yours.

 The Chairman

Monday
May242010

Coming Soon....

Ladies and Gentlemen,

The Chairman is readying his office to enlighten you with his regular updates.

Look forward to conversing soon....

Mr & Mrs Chairman 

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